Beginner Again

It took nearly a decade to build my framework for learning and it allows me to enable autopilot when targeting a new skill or technique.

Define and understand it, gather resources from trust worthy sources, recursively execute and consume resources.

More often than not I see success — whether it’s a new API, fixing an appliance or building a garden bed. My learning framework often allowed me to bypass the novice period even in new ventures.

Except Hockey. I tried all the same approaches but I’m still my wife’s favorite flailing player.

Hawks vs Devils

A friend of mine was giving away some of his season tickets to a game he couldn’t make, so my first ever NHL game, fortunate enough to see Toews, was the Hawks vs NJ Devils.

I could say “I don’t have a good explanation for why it hit the way it did,” but c’mon the United Center is downright special. I have memories watching Bulls games with my father so my eyes were up at the banners initially. At that point I’ve never watched a full hockey game.

Intoxicating, unhinged, fast, elegant, violent — I couldn’t stop thinking about it afterwards.

Humbled

So I fell got on the ice.

As a 90’s kid I grew up on wheels so I wasn’t terrible but I for sure wasn’t good. My body had no reference point for what I was asking it to do. Every instinct I had was wrong. My brain knew what I wanted; the rest of me had no idea what it was being asked.

And it was energizing and humbling.

I hadn’t been a real beginner at anything in almost a decade. I forgot what it feels like.

It’s not just that it was new. It’s that it was physical. My career has been all thinking, all reps I can do at a desk with coffee. This required exercise. It required athleticism and muscles I didn’t know I had. I couldn’t pattern match my way out of falling down (I still fall).

I had to be bad at something, in public — that turned out to be the whole point.

All In

My neurodivergent brain only knows one way. Hockey took up all of my brain and it’s been my healthier outlet, though the 4th period beer and pizza can make it a wash sometimes.

3 years since the Hawks vs Devils game:

• Started going to some empty mid-day public skates.
• Bought a complete entry-level gear setup and took an Adult Beginner class with some friends.
• Started finding extra ice time after hours.
• Joined a late night beer league with said friends.
• Won a championship! 🏆
• Started captaining my own team with the same friends in our league.
• Played in the Pucks for Autism summer tournament with my son and won our division! 🏆
• Stepped up to head coach my sons house league.

What It Is Now

Hockey to me is community, health, the challenge of a different growth path and something I share with my son. I’ve enjoyed being a beginner again.

I would encourage anyone to go find something that makes you fall down.